Whose to Blame?

Dear Everyone,

Yes, even you. NOBODY is exempt and nobody is perfect. We all have to do more, learn more, and BE more if we really want to make a great change. That is one of the biggest issues in society today. Nobody thinks they are the problem. It’s an “us” vs. “them” mentality, and you are always right, never wrong. Well I have news for you. You are wrong. To some, you are “the other side”. Have you ever thought about that? Really stopped and considered, “what hand am I playing in all of this?”. No! Of course you haven’t. Because we are all perfect, with zero flaws and know exactly what we are talking about (no alternative facts here, folks!), am I close?

The minute you throw that idea out the window -- the idea that you are always right and never wrong -- we will make progress. It’s really hard, I know. To admit, “maybe I don’t know everything after all” can be painful, embarrassing and weaken our egos. But sometimes it has to be done.

To the people asking “why isn’t there a white history month?” -- have you ever researched, really researched why and how Black History Month was established? No? That’s your homework tonight. See what you learn.

To the people asking “why on earth would ANYONE vote for Trump?” -- Have you ever asked someone why they did? Have you ever tried to see and understand what could have motivated them to do that? No? Go find someone and ask. Do your research. Look at the articles talking about the ‘forgotten’ white working-class and see what you learn. You might gain some perspective.

To the people who boycotted Starbucks because they said they were going to hire 10,000 refugees -- Did you do your research before you were so quick to boycott? Did you admit you were wrong when they released their letter about hiring 10,000 veterans? This is a good example of being able to admit when we are wrong and that we don’t know everything.

Things aren’t going to change until we are able to:

  • Admit when we are wrong or don’t know something, as hard as it may be.

  • Admit when someone else is right. It can be difficult to tell someone “you are right” or “I agree” but, put your ego aside and give credit where it is due.

  • Listen to opposing views, and really LISTEN. Listen to understand, not to respond.

  • Ask questions. Stop making assumptions, stereotyping and guessing why people are doing what they are doing. Ask them instead and have a conversation about it.

  • Try to find common ground or something you can agree on. A lot of times we think we are on completely different sides, when really there may be more in common than we think. Find what you can agree on and go from there.

  • Do research. Don’t form an opinion or react to something you don’t really know anything about. You have to do more than read a headline.

  • Realize, it is all about perspective. Just because you don’t see it or experience it, doesn’t mean it isn’t real.

If my parents can be two different races, two different political parties and two different religions, and still be thriving almost 20 years later, I think you can too. You just have to be willing to try.


The Woman Who Sees Both Sides






Cidnye Weimer is a 24-year-old bi-racial female from Cincinnati, Ohio. She received her bachelor’s degree in Journalism from Ohio University, and is currently completing a master’s in College Student Personnel at Ohio University as well. Her interests include traveling the world, trying new foods, and being tortured by Shonda Rhimes every Thursday night (#TGIT). You can follow her on Twitter or Instagram to stay connected and keep the conversation going @CidnyeWeimer
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