Losing Control of Life

HOW many times a day do you over think or stress out about things out of your control?

I don't think one day goes by that we, as twenty something’s, don't silently question what in the f*!% we are doing with our lives. I’m sure you thought I had it figured out after my bag lady post …Let it gooo…. But believe it or not, people still have suggestions for how I should be living MY life..(Ya know since getting paid to travel the world isn’t a dream job or anything).

Not only might you have your own peanut gallery constantly sharing unsolicited advice, your internal dialogue can get caught up in the madness too. If you’re anything like me, you have amazing friends who fall all along the “success” spectrum. Some are getting married and making the Stepford wife life look appealing. Most are getting multiple degrees so they can add letters to the end of their name when they greet people (*cough cough Kristen M.A.). While others may be working a job they don’t love and going out every night of the week to “blow off steam.” Regardless of what part of the spectrum you fall on, we all have one commonality. We question if we are doing “it” right all the time and we often find ourselves comparing our success to our peers. STOP. It’s unnecessary and draining your soul.

Side Bar: Just in case no one has told you recently, YOU ARE AMAZING and doing exactly what the universe intended in this very moment (obviously reading my blog is divine intervention)…. Seriously, even when you are messing up you are STILL doing everything right for you and the path you are on. STOP stressing. And if you’re not happy then refer to my first blog, Half Moon Bay and start the process to leap into your next adventure.

There is no one size fits all answer when it comes to success. What worked or is working for your friends, family, or peers may not work for you. A lot of us waste time searching for love or jobs; the very things we are programmed to believe bring “happiness” into our lives.

“If we just land that good job, then we will have the money to travel, go out and enjoy more …but what about the time we lose working 60+ hours a week. Do you actually get time to enjoy that hard-earned money?”

If we just find our soulmate, then we have someone to navigate life with… so we hold onto people that hurt us more than help us, just for the sake of not being alone. Is it worth wasting your energy when you end up more heartbroken in the end?”

Full disclosure guys, last year I was in a relationship with a cool dude; lived in an “adulting” apartment; had a salaried job… straight out of college. Theoretically, for an early 20 something, I was doing above average. I could travel at my leisure, I could pay my bills, and I could live comfortably. On the surface, my life looked great! Like I was doing everything right. My parents were so proud and my friends were kind of envious (in a motivational way cause we’re all boss bitches in real life) but honestly, truly none of it made me happy.

Fast forward not even a full year later and I've made an 180-degree turn in my life. I’m single and share a duplex with toooo many roommates and cut my salary in half. That makes no sense to people! However, this is the happiest I’ve been in my entire adult life, thus far. I was terrified to take this plunge, in fact, I almost stayed in OMAHA NEBRASKA to live “comfortably” in my dead end bubble( I know you’re judging me)……… The point is if I would have continued to plan and overthink about:

1.     how am I going to afford this move?

2.     where am I going to live?

3.     will I make new friends?

4.     Will my parents and friends think I’m crazy for leaving this stability?



Why do we make it so hard to manifest what already belongs to us? I’m not saying to sit back and do nothing cause everything will fall into your lap. BUT when you stop blocking your blessings; learn to love yourself; listen to yourself; trust that internal nagging…Stop comparing your achievements and milestones to others... then things WILL FALL INTO YOUR LAP.



As always thank you so much for reading my little caterpillars! Feel free to share, like, or comment if you feel compelled! I figured out how to add cute little links to social media below :)

Tonja ThompsonComment