Wow, turning 25! What a major marker in anyone’s adult life, A QUARTER CENTURY HAS PASSED. According to my teenage life plan, I was supposed to have multiple degrees, my dream home in some fancy city, with a Carrie Bradshaw shoe closet, and the perfect fiancé by now. That’s obviously not my reality! While I literally have nothing to complain about in my life, it’s just not what I imagined adulting would look like for me. I’m sure there are many of us out there having this same realization. Personally, I allowed social media, rom com’s and my favorite television shows cultivate an unrealistic vision of adulthood.
Ironically, when I flashback to my teenage years, this is exactly what the 25-year-olds I knew were doing. Some were raising kids, some lived with family members, and most were still figuring out how to fend for themselves. It just looked cooler back then because of all the freedom, that comes with adulthood. This is an open letter to my younger self and a reminder to all of us feeling like we aren’t where we thought we would be…
I know you’re making all these plans to turn 18 and never look back… Adulting looks so fun and easy, but I have news for you. Your parents will still tell you what to do at 25. The only difference is, you’ll appreciate their insight and actually listen to them in the future. It’s just like your favorite movie… your mom and mum both turn out to be your BEST friends. Your dad isn’t so bad either, give him a break during those teenage years! Tell them you love them more often and don’t be mad when they lock you out for sneaking to the club😉
18, 21, and 25 aren’t going to be the golden ages you anticipated…but don’t let it cloud all of your accomplishments at each milestone. You’ve traveled to cities people dream of, you’ve survived 3 major life moves and have amazing friends all across the country. Honey, you have a lifetime ahead of you to check everything off your list! Don’t rush it.
Some people will continuously try to weasel their way back into your life. I know how much you like closure, but I promise… save yourself the headache. If they didn’t make the cut the first time they still don’t belong in your life.
Speaking of, dating looks bleak at 25. You’ll have plenty of wonderful and perfectly adequate suitors but promise me you won’t settle for a “good guy.” You can have it all if you’re patient. Don’t worry, the high school boy who broke your heart, girl you dodged a bullet!!!!! Not because he isn’t a good guy but because he wasn’t your guy! I promise you’ll learn to live without him. In fact, many more will come and go, and you’ll get your heart broken once more. Just don’t give up, even after you meet the one and lose him. Always remember these are lessons you have to learn for your journey.
I don’t want to get too specific and give away the future so here are a few of the most important take a-ways you’ve learned thus far:
1. Crying isn’t just for breakups or deaths. It’s okay to cry yourself to sleep some nights, you’ll feel better in the morning.
2. Laughing until you cry is also very acceptable too!
3. Getting a degree doesn’t mean much unless you’re a doctor... network because it’s who you know that will help in the end.
4. Your happiness is way more important than the money.
5. Say YES more often, you never know what opportunity or experience is waiting for you.
6. Protect your energy. It is perfectly fine to be unavailable. Ignore texts and phone calls and people that drain you until you’re ready to acknowledge them.
7. I cannot stress this enough, mental health is all you have at the end of the day. Talk about your depression, anxiety, and everything else. You could help someone else by sharing…. And holding it in only makes it worst.
8. Your tribe is your everything. Your people will support you through every breakup, get back together, and life-altering move. Just don’t forget to be there for them when you’re going through it too. You need each other.
9. Roommates can become your people too
10. Being open to new experiences is scary but don’t be scared to jump off the cliff, out of the airplane or across the country to a new adventure. What’s waiting for you is a pleasant surprise
Ton, the most important thing I want you to know and always remember “Love yourself wholly and fully, even when it’s not reciprocated from others.” When all else fails, you’ll always have you❤
Drop a comment below, share one of your own life lessons you would have loved to tell your younger self! And if you want to share your own letters with me email me using the box below. I can't wait to see what everyone's learned!